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Saturday, December 15, 2012 08:43 PM |
Thoughts |
by Fëanor |
If I told 14-year-old me that in 20 years he'd sit with a beautiful woman who was his wife and a wonderful child who was his son and eat spicy noodles with peanuts for dinner, I'm not sure which of those things would be more unbelievable to him. Probably the noodles. |
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Thursday, December 13, 2012 11:12 AM |
Cars |
by Fëanor |
While driving poppy to work this morning, a white Mercedes Benz with tinted windows pulled out in front of us. I'm already thinking, rather uncharitably, "The person driving this car is probably a jerk." Then I see that the license plate is a personalized one reading "ON QVC," and it is set in a "Mercedes Benz of Beverly Hills" license plate frame. Yeah, that person is definitely a jerk. Also, I nearly choked myself laughing. Did they somehow get the car from QVC? Does QVC sell cars? Or is this a person who often hosts QVC specials? Regardless... wow.
Later on, saw another car with a personalized license plate: "MIN RICE." Does that mean something I don't know or does this person just really love minute rice? |
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Thursday, September 6, 2012 08:48 AM |
Honest McDonalds Ads |
by Fëanor |
As a follow-up to this post, I present some ideas for new, more honest McDonalds advertising slogans.
McDonalds. What else are you gonna do? Cook?
McDonalds. Can you actually afford anything better? We didn't think so.
What else is here? Sbarros? Ugh. Guess you're going to McDonalds!
Life is naught but soul-crushing emptiness and despair. So what the fuck? Might as well go to McDonalds. |
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Wednesday, September 5, 2012 03:05 PM |
(Last updated on Thursday, September 6, 2012 08:49 AM) | Stop, McDonalds. Just Stop. |
by Fëanor |
The more recent McDonalds advertising seems to be trying to convince us that it is a hip, cool restaurant where hip, cool, young people come to smile prettily at each other, and to enjoy healthy treats like salads, oatmeal, fruit smoothies, and the like.
Does anybody actually believe this about McDonalds, besides perhaps isolated tribesmen who have never seen or heard about the place before? McDonalds is where you go when you are desperate and you need some greasy garbage that you can stuff down your food hole RIGHT NOW, to reward yourself for being good, punish yourself for being awful, or just because there are literally no other options.
Embrace what you are, McDonalds! Don't try to be something else. You fill an important niche! An important, horrible, desperate niche.
UPDATE: I thought it only right I compose a follow-up post containing some alternative, honest McDonalds ads. |
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Wednesday, March 7, 2012 11:06 AM |
Recyclotron |
by Fëanor |
Fëanor pours the entire internet into the Recyclotron, and only the best links come out the other end for you to enjoy.
- Dude, my friends wrote a book! You can buy it! You should buy it. Buy it now!
- One of my favorite of the recent posts on Reproductive Ryan Gosling. My very own poppy is a co-founder and contributor!
- Awww, look at the tiny Avengers! So tiny!
- A little goat! Hopping! On a bed!
- I love Marion, and I love Raiders of the Lost Ark, but... yeah. Baskets. *facepalm*
- Female Holmes and Watson.
- Blue And Bluer celebrates one of the great film classics, Grosse Pointe Blank.
- Some Game of Thrones humor.
- A little Daily Show for you.
- Heh. Poor Michelle.
- SANDWICH POLICE. That is all.
- Now here's something you can base a system of government on!
- Can't remember if I posted this before, but it's worth a repost if I didn't: Elmo and Grover as Street Fighters.
- An old script for an episode of the original Star Trek that was never filmed is going to get turned into a webisode by the New Voyages crew. Nice!
- There are birthday cake Oreos? Where can I get them?!
- Oh hey, it's that time of year again! March M.O.D.O.K. Madness!
- I kind of want this bird nest bed.
- Some pics from, and a new trailer for, Men in Black 3. I want to like this, because the original Men in Black is such a great movie, but... I just don't know.
- Another movie I want to like is John Carter. You can watch ten minutes of it right here. I was hoping to be really impressed by this, but despite some clever moments (and an inspired choice of when to cut short the clip), I could take or leave this movie.
- Some really cool props from Captain America, Iron Man, and Thor are up for auction.
- Cool Star Wars crayons.
- Cute Saruman figurine. All right, maybe cute isn't the right word, but whatever, I like it, is the point.
- Wow. Mike Mignola did a book cover for Heart of Darkness. Two great tastes that taste great together!
- I've mostly soured on the whole Simpson-izing thing, but these Simpsons versions of Scooby and Shaggy are fun.
- Look out! Tiger Batman!
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Tagged (?): Animals (Not), Animated GIFs (Not), Art (Not), Avengers (Not), Batman (Not), Books (Not), Captain America (Not), Cartoons (Not), Celebrities (Not), Comedy (Not), Comic books (Not), Craft (Not), Food (Not), Game of Thrones (Not), Iron Man (Not), Links (Not), Mike Mignola (Not), Monty Python (Not), Movies (Not), Muppets (Not), Photography (Not), Politics (Not), Products (Not), Recyclotron (Not), Scooby-Doo (Not), Sherlock Holmes (Not), Simpsons (Not), Song of Ice and Fire (Not), Star Trek (Not), Star Wars (Not), Street Fighter (Not), Thor (Not), Toys (Not), TV (Not), Video (Not) |
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Monday, February 27, 2012 10:34 AM |
Recyclotron |
by Fëanor |
Fëanor pours the entire internet into the Recyclotron, and only the best links come out the other end for you to enjoy.
- Fun with lyrics!
- A wonderful animated gif of an amusing moment in one of Mr. Eddie Izzard's stand-up routines.
- A real, solid, scientific explanation of why cats purr.
- Mr. Hipp mashes up Star Wars and Super Mario Bros.
- Ridley Scott explains the connection between Alien and Prometheus. I'm still a little confused, but okay.
- The evolution of "Weird" Al.
- We can print robot dinosaurs now?? Awesome.
- Here's a computer case made to look like Link.
- Amazing, gigantic Lord of the Rings family tree. (Via)
- Tongue-based computer controller!
- Hey, that dude from The Killing might be Robocop.
- A couple of interesting pics of Benedict Cumberbatch on the set of Star Trek 2. Looks like he's getting the ol' neck pinch!
- When I heard they were re-releasing the universally reviled Phantom Menace in theaters in 3D, I was really curious what kind of audience it would have. I mean, everybody says they hate this movie! Why would anyone pay extra to see it again in one more dimension than before? Then again, it's Star Wars. Star Wars has a certain cache. And nerds are famous for paying for things so they can then complain about them endlessly. Plus, there's the kid factor. Kids don't know they're supposed to hate The Phantom Menace. Well, looks like the nerd and kid factors won out, because the 3D version made $73.4 million in less than two weeks and pushed the movie's overall box office total over the billion dollar mark to make it the 11th highest grossing film of all time. Wow.
- Speaking of Star Wars, here are some rejected Star Wars products. Also, in the upcoming Star Wars game for Kinect, there will be a Slave Leia dance-off.
- Cute Wizard of Oz cupcakes.
- Here's a little boy piloting a mecha suit.
- I love this stamp.
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Tagged (?): Animals (Not), Animated GIFs (Not), Art (Not), Celebrities (Not), Comedy (Not), Computers (Not), Craft (Not), Dinosaurs (Not), Food (Not), Links (Not), Mario (Not), Mashups (Not), Movies (Not), Music (Not), Oz (Not), Photography (Not), Products (Not), Recyclotron (Not), Robots (Not), Science (Not), Star Trek (Not), Star Wars (Not), Technology (Not), The Killing (Not), Tolkien (Not), TV (Not), Video (Not), Video games (Not), Zelda (Not) |
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Thursday, January 5, 2012 05:58 PM |
The Adventures of Fat Guy & Son |
by Fëanor |
The boy didn't nap hardly at all today, despite my parents' best efforts (they look after him when I work from home), so I resolved to use the age-old tactic of desperate parents everywhere and drive him around for a while to see if that would knock him out. As I was getting us ready to head out (always a lengthy procedure), he caught sight of a bowl of Cheerios that I was keeping in the diaper bag as an emergency snack and made noises and motions to indicate that he wished to consume these immediately. Clearly dinner was going to have to happen before a nap, so I sat him down with the Os and some water while I grabbed myself a salad, baby carrots, and some veggie dip out of the fridge. We each munched on our own stuff in silence for a while until he made noises and motions to indicate he wanted some of my carrots. He has often shown interest in baby carrots for some reason, despite the fact that whenever he puts one in his mouth, he becomes visibly distressed. The same thing happened this time, but he followed up his sour expression with further motions that seemed to indicate he wanted to try what I was doing: dipping the carrots. When I asked him if he wanted some dip, he even agreed by repeating "dip" as best he could in toddler-ese. This was extremely impressive, so I had to comply. Of course, once I put a little dip on a carrot and gave it to him, he just sucked the dip off and handed me the carrot back, indicating that I was to apply more dip forthwith. Being the pushover I am, I did so. After a while this became tiresome and more than a little gross, so I did something even more gross: I scooped out a nice dollop of dip into a bowl, stuck a spoon in it, and handed it to him. After eating a good amount of this, he switched over to using the dip as paint and applied a liberal coating to his platter and water cup. He then noticed that somehow his hands had gotten disgracefully dirty and requested that I clean them immediately. It seemed time to move on at this point, so I finally got us packed up and out.
Our default destination when we take the boy for a (hopefully) sleep-inducing drive is the closest Dunkin' Donuts with a drive thru, so that's where I headed this time. He babbled and burbled his way all the way there, and things were looking grim. Worse still, as I pulled away from the Dunkin' Donuts, I realized that either his sense of smell has become excellent, or I've been to too many drive thrus with him, because he put his hand out and started grunting. I had no choice but to fill the hand with one of the munchkins I'd purchased. A little ways on, the whining began again, and I saw the hand sticking out again in my rear view mirror. Once again I filled the hand.
Thankfully this wasn't repeated. The boy continued burbling for a while, but as I neared home, the backseat, now dark with evening, became suddenly quiet. Hoping against hope, I circled the block a few more times, then carefully pulled into the driveway. When I opened the backdoor, I found him fast asleep and slumped completely sideways, a small chunk of munchkin clutched in his hand, crumbs of munchkin down his coat, and his socks inexplicably torn off and thrown onto the seat beside him.
Young man, I salute you. |
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Monday, December 19, 2011 12:21 PM |
(Last updated on Monday, December 19, 2011 01:49 PM) | Recyclotron |
by Fëanor |
Hey, remember when I used to post things like this to this here blog?? Thought I'd try it again, just to see how it goes. Enjoy!
Fëanor pours the entire internet into the Recyclotron, and only the best links come out the other end for you to enjoy.
- Some fun recent posters on Reelizer: My Neighbor Totoro, Blade Runner, and Seven Samurai.
- Speaking of Blade Runner and My Neighbor Totoro... And here's another amusing mashup.
- Make your own chocolate D&D dice. (Via)
- This bootleg copy of the Dark Knight Rises trailer is crazy exciting. (UPDATE: Here's the official trailer.)
- A holiday-themed Wondermark! And here's one that's far too accurate to my experience.
- Dude! Officially licensed Lord of the Rings LEGO toys?? There goes all my money.
- Commercials are now legally obligated to not be so damn loud, which makes the fist-waving old man inside me very happy.
- The house banners from A Song of Ice and Fire, redone in super-cute, chibi style.
- The trailer for Expendables 2. Just a teaser, really, but how about that cast!
- I was surprised that Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol was getting such good reviews until I remembered it's directed by Pixar genius Brad Bird. Yeah, I might have to see that.
- The Avengers trailer! You think you've seen it already, but have you seen this version?? It has extra scenes, and it's in German!
- So even though Ridley Scott's Prometheus is essentially a prequel to his Alien film, it will not actually feature the alien, or xenomorph, at all. Huh. Okay then.
- Every year Matthew "defective yeti" Baldwin writes a guide to the best new board games. Always fun! Here's this year's.
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Tagged (?): Advertising (Not), Aliens (Not), Art (Not), Avengers (Not), Batman (Not), Boardgames (Not), Comedy (Not), Commercials (Not), Craft (Not), Food (Not), Gaming (Not), Holiday (Not), LEGO (Not), Links (Not), Lists (Not), Mashups (Not), Movies (Not), News (Not), Recyclotron (Not), Song of Ice and Fire (Not), Star Wars (Not), Tolkien (Not), Toys (Not), TV (Not), Video (Not), Web comics (Not) |
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Monday, September 12, 2011 12:26 PM |
Recyclotron |
by Fëanor |
Fëanor pours the entire internet into the Recyclotron, and only the best links come out the other end for you to enjoy.
- Egon 4-evah!
- Yep, been there, done that.
- This styrofoam cup art is pretty awesome.
- Mr. Hipp does it again with a couple of amazing Lord of the Rings pieces.
- A huge timeline infographic reveals what the future will be like, according to films. (Via)
- io9 offers you the chance to vote for the greatest use of pop music in all of sci-fi and fantasy. IIRC, I picked "You Could Be Mine" from T2, "Mad World" from Donnie Darko, "Johnny B. Goode" from Back to the Future, and "Day-O" from Beetlejuice.
- io9 has also collected for you the most amazing space pictures of 2011.
- Doctor Who My Little Ponies!
- What if Darth Vader's infamous "Nooooo!" were edited into other classic movies? In that same vein, here's Star Wars before and after blu-ray-ification.
- The first two episodes of a new Fringe web series.
- The trailer for Luke Cage! (OK, not really. Sorry to disappoint you there.)
- I usually avoid reposting Blastr's top ten lists, because that's all they ever post and it's kind of sad (although I don't have much room to talk...), but this one is rather fun: fake TV shows inside of real TV shows. Itchy & Scratchy is a classic, of course, and All My Circuits is always hilarious.
- Apparently carrots are only orange for political reasons.
- More of Sucklord's fantastic custom action figures.
- Cool piece of art created with tape. Also, Olly Moss' scary/funny Pikachu, and Kate Beaton's more accurate version of the Cheesecake Factory's logo.
- Lovecraftian lollipops! They're unspeakably delicious!
- Huh. Threadless is doing a pretty cool new thing.
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Tagged (?): Art (Not), Books (Not), Business (Not), Clothes (Not), Comedy (Not), Comic books (Not), Craft (Not), Doctor Who (Not), Food (Not), Fringe (Not), Ghostbusters (Not), Links (Not), Lists (Not), Lovecraft (Not), Movies (Not), Music (Not), Parenthood (Not), Photography (Not), Recyclotron (Not), Shirts (Not), Space (Not), Star Wars (Not), Tolkien (Not), Toys (Not), TV (Not), Video (Not) |
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Thursday, June 30, 2011 12:17 PM |
(Last updated on Friday, July 1, 2011 02:15 PM) | Recyclotron |
by Fëanor |
Fëanor pours the entire internet into the Recyclotron, and only the best links come out the other end for you to enjoy.
- I think I might have to take part in #ThePact. So if you see a picture of me eating a donut in my Twitter stream tomorrow, that's what that's about. (UPDATE: Here you go.)
- This unlimited movie pass, which allows you to see as many movies in the theater as you like for $50 a month, is a great concept, and I think I probably would have been all over it in my free-wheeling, movie-obsessed, bachelor days.
- Jesus Christ. There are actually six (6!) different versions of Frankenstein in development in Hollywood right now. Thanks a lot, Twilight.
- Also, they are still trying to get that He-Man movie made, apparently. I love He-Man and all, but I just don't see that turning out well.
- A collection of negative and positive quotes from critics about Transformers 3. You would have to pay me a very large sum of money to see this movie.
- I do enjoy a good Super Punch image roundup.
- A trailer and a gameplay video for a new Phineas and Ferb video game, subtitled Across the Second Dimension. There's a movie of the same title that'll be airing on the Disney channel soon. Exciting!
- If you hadn't heard yet, World of Warcraft is now free to play until level 20. Tempting! But even when I do get the time these days, I tend to avoid playing video games and work on making one, instead. So I think I'll still be staying away from WoW for the foreseeable future.
- I am intrigued by Google+! I'll just wait here for my invite. Doo dee doo dee doo... Anybody? (UPDATE: I'm on! Thanks, Amy!)
- I've always been a big fan of Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness, as well as Francis Ford Coppola's Vietnam War film adaptation, Apocalypse Now, so I'm kind of excited that there's going to be a sci-fi film adaptation called Into Darkness, even if the people involved aren't exactly top notch talent.
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Tagged (?): Art (Not), Books (Not), Captain America (Not), Cartoons (Not), Comedy (Not), Comic books (Not), Food (Not), Google (Not), Internet (Not), Links (Not), Masters of the Universe (Not), Monsters (Not), Movies (Not), News (Not), Phineas and Ferb (Not), Recyclotron (Not), Transformers (Not), TV (Not), Twitter (Not), Video games (Not), Web comics (Not), World of Warcraft (Not) |
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